Flag of Santa's Martian Empire

Another flag for a flag contest on alternatehistory.com, this one for "A flag controlled by the personification of a national holiday" or some such. Naturally I threw sanity to the wind and conjured this up. Enjoy!


It all started when Santa Claus, the embodiment of joy and merriment in the world, was forced to make an impassioned plea to the United Nations in front of the entire world. Global warming, he proclaimed, not only threatened the future of the world, but it more immediately impacted his ability to keep his operations functional. As the ice caps melted, the foundations on which his enterprise were built became more and more tenuous, and it was only a matter of time before he was forced to pack up shop and end the Christmas tradition of gift-giving altogether.

None of it made a difference in the end, despite an enthusiastic endorsement from Coca-Cola (thanks to Santa's connections in polar bear circles), and no action continued to be taken on climate change. Santa, utterly fed up, declared his intention to go on strike, resolving to cease delivery unless weak-kneed politicians grew a spine and stood up to the anti-science crowd to try and make a difference. Nations of the world called his bluff, believing that he would never go through with his threat.

Suffice to say, they were wrong.

On Christmas Day of that year, the children of the world woke up to find not a single present from Santa under their trees, and there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. Desperate to dodge any and all blame (as they are wont to do), politicians of the world united in their condemnation of Santa, demanding he deliver the presents their kids were entitled to. Santa continued to refuse, relations continued to deteriorate, and in the end, at the behest of crying children everywhere, the nations of the world declared their intent to invade the North Pole and take what they saw as rightfully theirs.

Santa (who at this point had become utterly disillusioned with the attitudes of both child and adult alike), in response, decided to leave the planet altogether. Using his paramystical powers to bend space and time, he transported his entire operation (sleigh, elves, reindeer, workshop and all) across the interplanetary void and to the planet of Mars, a cold world of ice, desert and green-skinned nomadic Martians. However, the sheer effort of transporting such a mass across such a distance utterly crippled Santa, rendering him immobile and necessitating his being placed in a massive life-support chair, to keep him alive while his health and powers replenished themselves.

However, the elves (who were basically in charge now) were forced to confront a more immediate problem; the Martians had learned of this fantastic new technologically- and magically-advanced fortress, word had spread quickly about the goodies within, and they were as eager to get their hands on them as the nations of Earth were. Out of options, the elves were forced to take up arms against the Martians, driving them back and shifting the workshop of Santa to a new paradigm; that of the construction of military technology to defend their territory.

Today, the Empire of Santa and his Helpers holds sway over the vast majority of the planet Mars. Evergreen conifers have spread out of control over the Martian surface, having turned out to be an invasive species, dying a substantial part of the planet green. Santa's workshop has bloated into a gargantuan monstrosity of science and mysticism; endlessly churning out weapons, ammunition and other such items in order to keep the Martians in line. Elves mounted on armoured polar bears, supplemented by giant mecha-Krampuses (Krampi?) and reindeer-and-sleigh air support, patrol the deserts, raiding settlements and confiscating any prohibited items (like weapons for instance; as the elves put it: “You don't need to hunt to survive anymore; Santa will provide.”).

The elves are also building hegemony and their arsenal for another reason; they are not sure whether they and Earth will ever see contact again. Perhaps Santa, when he recovers, will want to return to Earth and pay them back for driving him off to begin with, or maybe Earth is working on a means to get to Mars and get back the presents of multiple Christmases that they are still relentlessly pursuing. Either way, the elves are hedging their bets.